Yasmien Kurdi and Alfred Vargas stress parents' role amid bullying, social media issues

Showbiz personalities Yasmien Kurdi and Alfred Vargas discussed how they, as parents, handle children’s safety online as the influence of social media and video games on kids increase on “Fast Talk with Boy Abunda.”   

The discussion opened with their reactions to the recent deadly school shooting in Tacloban carried out by two boys, ages 15 and 14, killing three and injuring 20.

Yasmien could not imagine how agonizing it was for the families especially for the parents of the victims. “Ang hirap. Hindi ko ma-imagine na mauuna pa sa'yo ang anak mo. Ang sakit nun."

She thinks the tragedy might have stemmed from unresolved problems, describing it as a “ticking bomb” that had been building up over time.

The actress pointed to deeper issues involving mental health, family communication, and social environment, stressing that parents should regularly talk to their children and monitor not only academics but also emotional well-being.

Alfred said the news deeply affected him as a parent. "Kinilabutan ako sa takot. As a parent, ang sakit, nakakadurog ng puso."

The actor-politician extended condolences and wished for the recovery and psychosocial healing of those injured. Based on initial PNP reports, he noted bullying as a possible factor and said, “For me, any form of bullying should not be tolerated.”

Yasmien explained that, under the law, children below 15 generally have no criminal liability but may still have civil liability, with parents held financially responsible. She also distinguished cases involving minors who act "with discernment," which carry different legal implications.

Alfred said these platforms play a significant role. He supported proposals to regulate online platforms, including those raised by Senator Bam Aquino, but emphasized that regulation should be science-based and carefully calibrated rather than a “blanket” ban.

Alfred pointed out that even with government agencies and schools calling for better policies and restrictions, no system can replace active parenting.

"No amount of systems can really address this kapag ang magulang nagiging pabaya, hindi ka na nababantayan, hindi natuturo sa'yo ang tama at mali." He also warned against dismissing concerning behavior as merely "larong bata."

"Pero tingnan ninyo ang nangyari. Iyong maliliit na bagay, nagpapatong-patong, tapos lalaki iyan."

Alfred said parents should be held responsible for their children’s serious offenses, through measures such as community service, psychosocial support, seminars, or jail time in cases of proven neglect.

Yasmien shared that she is a gamer but does not allow her daughter to play Roblox due to online safety concerns. “It’s role-playing… may strangers na puwedeng makipag-chat.”

She instead bonds with her daughter through games like Mobile Legends. Yasmien also monitors her child's social media by linking accounts to track interactions and content exposure. Her daughter accepts this as part of her parents' responsibilities.

Both Alfred and Yasmien addressed proposals to lower the age of criminal liability. Yasmien said lawmakers should examine possible loopholes if minors are exploiting the law.

“Kailangan talaga suriin nila ng maayos with sensitivity kasi mga minors pa rin.’ Alfred agreed, saying, “Science-based tayo. I’m open to it,” and noted differences in the actions of the 14- and 15-year-old suspects in the Tacloban case.

Yasmien also emphasized the importance of stronger implementation of online child protection measures. On disciplining children, Yasmien stressed that parents must never ignore wrongdoing.

"Kapag may nakikita kang mali, huwag mong ikonsente. Kailangan sabihin mo sa kanya kung ano ang tama at mali. Kaya tayo nandito, to guide them."

She also questioned whether parents of bullies are aware of their children’s behavior. "Kung ang nanay mismo bully, ano pa ang anak." she remarked.

Alfred added that while not all parents know of their children being bullies, some do, which only harm the kids in the long run.

“Merong iba, kinu-konsinte pa. Kahit alam na nilang bully iyong anak nila, gagawin ang lahat kahit magsinungaling sa lahat para lang ipagtanggol iyong anak nila na nagkamali.”

Both agreed that social media age restrictions should be strictly followed.

Yasmien also recounted filing a complaint with the Department of Education over her daughter’s experience with bullying. She said she submitted photos, videos, conversations, and other evidence and is still awaiting resolution.

She explained that her daughter wanted the complaint filed after experiencing repeated bullying, including classmates taking her belongings and deliberately ganging up on her, in what she described as premeditated actions.

Yasmien criticized how some schools handle bullying cases, saying responses often lack empathy and communication, and instead rely on legal statements. She stressed that schools should work closely with parents, as they are entrusted with children’s safety.

Alfred shared that his son’s experience happened outside school during swimming training, where he was allegedly repeatedly held underwater by other children. Despite raising concerns with parents and institutions, he said the issue was dismissed, prompting him to file a legal case since the Anti-Bullying Act only covers school premises.

He found it painful when he was told it was just “larong bata.” He thinks not resolving the incident or making it look minor allows abuse to escalate.

In closing, Alfred encouraged parents facing situations of bullying  to not lose hope. "Hindi po kayo nag-iisa. Kailangan labanan natin ang pang-aapi at pang-aabuso."

Yasmien advised parents to carefully choose schools by reviewing policies, handbooks, past incidents, and how bullying cases are handled.