The times when Dad 'tricked' me

Sometimes, I find myself smiling when I remember our late father and how he used to “trick” me to teach me important life lessons.

I remember when Dad "tricked" me into overcoming my fear of dogs... I hated dogs when I was young. I didn't want to get near them at all but my two siblings — Fernando (Dindo) and our youngest Melissa (Lizel) loved dogs. 

One day, Dad surprised me with a beautiful toy, a soft plushie, a brown Cocker Spaniel dog.

Dad said that the toy was "Snoopy." I said, "But it's brown." But Dad insisted that it was Snoopy… He knew that I liked the cartoon character Snoopy, a white dog, a beagle, not a Cocker Spaniel. Well if he says so, what could I do?

My brother's pet dog at that time was also named "Snoopy." I slowly warmed up to my brother's dog Snoopy that eventually I was the one feeding it and bathing it.

I learned to love dogs so much that over the years, my husband Riz and I became fur parents to Bingles, a West Highland white terrier; Cody and Stacey, both Basset Hounds or hush puppies, and Mister Toby and Patchi, both mini-poodles.

My brother now does not even own a dog because their daughter likes cats (she has seven!). 

MY ORANGE CHICKEN

Another of “Dad’s tricks” that I remember was when I started cooking at age 14. I loved to read books at that time, anything and everything — the Holy Bible, pocketbooks, encyclopedias, dictionaries, medical books, and even cookbooks. 

From one of our Mom’s cookbooks, I saw a recipe for “Orange Chicken.” I thought of cooking it because I love oranges, I can eat four in a day because when we lived in Australia, we had orange trees in our backyard. 

However, when I saw the Orange Chicken recipe in a cookbook, we were already in the Philippines and we didn’t have any oranges in the fridge. I used Tang orange juice and the chicken dish I cooked tasted so bad! I couldn’t eat it but Dad said he liked it. I doubted him but what he said gave me confidence to cook. 

Cooking is  now one of my favorite things to do. I always experiment in the kitchen. Our 90-year-old neighbor said the chicken pork adobo I cooked was the best adobo she ever tasted. I am very proud of this because she has 90 years of experience in eating… 

I seldom cook that kind of adobo though because it takes me six hours to cook it. I cook the chicken separately from the pork and the chicken liver and the sauce. The chicken, I even roast it in the oven. The adobo sauce has premium soy sauce, oyster sauce, Cabernet Sauvignon, sesame oil, French butter, and so on. It is definitely an adobo with a lot of love and a lot of ingredients.

“I WILL NEVER EVER…”

I also remember when I was seven years old and Dad saw me writing on a piece of pad paper: "I will never ever talk to Dindo again. I will never ever talk to Dindo again. I will never ever talk to Dindo again."

I was writing those words over and over again, line by line, because I had a fight with my younger brother Dindo.

I cannot remember anymore what our fight was about but I remember Dad asking if I will really never ever speak to brother even when we get old and I said, "Yes. Never."

However, later that day as we were about to have dinner, Dad told me to call my brother from his room. Without thinking, I ran to get my brother.

When I returned to the table, Dad smiled and reminded me of what I had written, teaching me that it’s impossible—and wrong—to avoid speaking to family over a simple disagreement.

Dad taught me to let go of certain grudges but he also taught me to fight when I had to. I remember before leaving for college, he said I should never ever be afraid to stand up to anybody when I am in the right and when I am speaking the truth. I don’t know what prompted him to tell me that but until now, I cherish those words and strive to live by them.

TEACHING BY EXAMPLE

Dad didn’t always used tricks to teach us lessons. He mostly tried to teach us by example. Our Dad, Lauro Velarde, was once the head of a car company in the Philippines. There was a time when we had two helpers, two drivers, one gardener, and three security guards.

However, he still made us do house chores, especially on weekends. Dad said it was important to be knowledgeable about practical, everyday matters. We need to know how to take care of ourselves and not be dependent on others. 

As the eldest child, I had to help Mom cook lunch or dinner, sweep the floor, fold clothes, or wash dishes. I didn’t mind doing these things because we also saw Dad cooking from time to time. 

He would make “atchara” from the papayas from our backyard or meat loaf from ground pork. We saw him sweeping the yard, cleaning the car, watering plants, washing dishes, and so on.

Even on the day that he died, our neighbors said they saw Dad busily working in the yard. Dad died on August 17, 2007, a day before his 65th birthday. 

He was supposed to have a big birthday celebration with family and friends invited. But then he had a heart attack. Until this day, it is one of the most painful things I have experienced. 

We miss you, Dad, and we pray for you every single day. We will always cherish and value all the things you taught us. We love you, Dad. Happy Father’s Day in Heaven!

Disclaimer: The opinions expressed by the author are her own and do not in any way reflect those of Paraluman News.